politics

Bush's new drug tzar:
The Snow Man

Here's a brief overview of his resume:

- The Snow Man's heritage is French-Canadian and Lake Effect snow.

- Exeter, '65 cum laude.

- Yale '69. He was a fellow fraternity brother of George W. Bush in the Skull and Bones. Nickname: The Snow Blower. Around Yale, he was known as a fixture in front of their fraternity house during snowstorms. While president of the fraternity, he insisted that they roll ten-dollar bills, instead of Benjamin Franklins when snorting. They donated the difference to a charity that helped subsidized yacht programs in land-locked inner city high schools. He eventually received a degree in divinity.

- National Guard Air Force reserves in Anchorage, Alaska. '69-'71.

- There's a five-year gap in his resume.

- Silent investor in Club 54.

- Board of executives for the DeLorean corporation. ('What if the door of the car opened like a spaceship?', the snow man suggested, before passing the mirror on.)

- Born-again Christian.

- Becomes a promise keeper.

- Invests 11 cents in a Canadian Junior hockey team franchise. Campaigns the town of Saskatchewan to build a new stadium for the hockey team. Three years later, the partnership group sells the hockey team and the new stadium for an enormous profit. The Snow Man receives $12.2 million.

- Forms the organization, 'Snow Man against Global Warming.'