Republicans ask: 'Is it safe' to vote for Kerry; the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth vs. Kerry
by Casey Flynn
'It's absolutely essential that eight weeks from today, on Nov. 2, we make the right choice, because if we make the wrong choice then the danger is that we'll get hit again and we'll be hit in a way that will be devastating from the standpoint of the United States.'
Many people have taken the statement to mean that Vice President Cheney implies that a Kerry victory would result in more terrorist attacks. Vice President Cheney's office has clarified the statement by explaining that actually what Vice President Cheney was suggesting was simply that Bush and Cheney are stronger leaders for America to fight the war on terrorism, and intended no disrespect to the metrosexuals Kerry and Edwards. Likewise, George Bush has equally made the point that he would be a better President for the war on terror, next to the flip-flopper and his heiress wife with the hard to place foreign accent.
And in fairness, Bush and Cheney are no doubt feared warrior leaders that cause consternation throughout the Al Qaeda network. Their respective bios alone speak to their formidability.
George Bush (Secret Service name: 'America's Santa Anna' or the 'Snowman') does indeed have a distinguished record as a fierce warrior.
During the Vietnam War, fighter pilot George Bush attempted and succeeded in getting a transfer to that part of the Air National Guard in Alabama that did not have planes. (Everyone else from the Ivy League who went to Alabama in the '60s went to march for Civil Rights; in 1972, George Bush went there to work on the senatorial campaign of Winton 'Red' Blount, who arguably ran on a segregationist platform).
Then there is the issue of whether he failed to show up for his physical because he was on cocaine. Bush friends have vehemently rejected this unfounded accusation.
'This is totally not the case, I was with George Bush during that time, and I recall him saying that he had forgotten to take his physical, but now it was too late because he was planning to attend Harvard's MBA program,' said Bush family friend, John DeLorean.
Then there are two competing stories about whether George Bush ever showed up in Alabama (with the exception of showing up to run the segregationist senator's campaign) to serve with the National Guard there. Democratics are claiming that he never reported for duty in Alabama, while the Republicans counter by arguing that he never reported for duty in Alabama.
Vice President Dick Cheney (Secret Service name: 'pork barrel') is similarly distinguished. Much like Alexander the Great, who prior to the age of 30, conquered five different areas in the eastern Mediterranean coastline, due to his brilliance as a military tactician and leader, Dick Cheney, prior to the age of 30, received five different deferments from the Army because he was too fat, due to his brilliance as a bureaucratic tactician in filling out government forms, most in triplicate.
Dick Cheney is insistent that we need him for the war on terror, and that Kerry and Edwards are weak. Dick Cheney had his first bypass surgery at 15; Dick Cheney could not break up an Al Qaeda cell if they had a microwave with them.
Everyone says that Cheney is this brilliant tactician.
He made a fortune by procuring government contracts for Halliburton. This is far from Napoleon at Austerlitz, and more like something out of the Gilded Age or the 1960s Latin American Banana Republics.
In working for Halliburton, he helped establish what is known in public policy circles as the 'Cheney doctrine' for winning government contracts, which is as follows:
1. Head of company bidding, formally head of government agency awarding the contract;
2. Head of government agency awarding the contract,
formally head of company bidding;
3. Try to be the only company that is allowed to bid on the contract.
Only two of the three criteria need to be met for winning government contracts.
Clearly, Cheney is a regular Colonel David H. Hackworth (USA Ret.) - famed American army warrior who served 87 tours in Vietnam, received 137 purple hearts, and holds the consecutive day streak for winning purple hearts.
Republicans ask, 'Is it safe' to vote for Kerry - apparently not for blacks in Florida.
Swift Boat Veterans for Truth vs. Kerry
If you accept everything that the Swift Boat veterans say as gospel truth: Kerry still served (1) in Vietnam; (2) during a war; (3) under fire; (4) received one unchallenged purple heart; (5) saved a soldier's life by pulling him out of the water; (6) and has a medical malpractice case against his plastic surgeon (John, your statute of limitations is running).
Apparently, he might have been wrong about taking his swift boat into Cambodian territory, but lest we forget, Americans are traditionally not very strong in geography, and also something tells me that the border between Vietnam and Cambodia on the Mekong River is not demarcated with
a big sign reading: WELCOME TO CAMBODIA, THE WATER BUFFALO COUNTRY, with a custom station to declare fresh fruit and foreign currency.
In attempting to understand the controversy between the swift boat veterans and John Kerry, I use this analogy: it's like fellow classmates from John Kerry's Harvard law school (who support George Bush) are criticizing him for not doing as well as he claimed to do in Harvard law school; meanwhile not only did George W. Bush not go to Harvard law school; he can't read, and in that same period of time, worked on the senatorial campaign of arguably a segregationist.
In the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth (the Tom Berengers – Platoon reference, Oliver Stone's movie on Vietnam) vs. John Kerry (the Charlie Sheens), I have no opinion regarding who is right; only such intellectual titans like Sean Hannity or comparable forces on the left would take one side of the story or the other from these witnesses to this fog of war. All I know is that we should take all investigative reporters off of the Al Qaeda-cells-in-America beat, and get to the bottom of this.
I only raise three points regarding this matter. The Swift Boat veterans have taken the name: 'Swift Boat Veterans for Truth.' When did groups in this country start taking pointers from the former Soviet Union on how to craft a political message; the Soviet Union called their main propaganda newspaper: Pravda (Truth). Second, the Swift boat veterans have claimed that they are not partisan politicians and that they do not have an agenda, but to set the record straight on what John Kerry did in Vietnam. Nevertheless, it would not surprise me that if you were to ask these Swift Boat Veterans what they thought of the My Lai Massacre, they might tell you that it was merely a Habitat-for-Humanity village rebuilding project that went slightly awry. Finally, the Swift Boat veterans have stated that John Kerry did not deserve his medals, but recently ran ads that he was unpatriotic by throwing away the medals that they claim he never really deserved in the first place. It seems to me that they can have it both ways; if he never deserved those medals, what is the big deal if he got rid of them?
